So Many Changes

Wow, it's been a few years since I last blogged. Had so many changes going on in my life since the last time. Still clean and sober, 5 years 10 months....That's big for me and I'm so proud of myself. I moved October 31, 2016 from the Transitional Housing Program I was living at. Still in Pittsburgh, but live on the West Side of the Burgh. I'm also still a Cook for Meals On Wheels...been there 3 years and 2 1/2?months. Love, Love, Love my job. We struggle, but still hanging on by God's Grace and Mercy. So, anyway, my daughter and I moved into a 3 bedroom house (not that we need 3 bedrooms, but the fact of the matter is it's a house. Trying to maintain that, but it's much more, real rent with utilities. It's just crazy and I'm totally stressed out to the max. I pretty much work to pay rent and utilities. This is a serious struggle, but hanging on. Lord knows I need to find a second job. I'm trying to learn new things other than cooking. Whether it be working from home doing something, or something. That's something I got to really work on. I also want to learn to blog ( is that what I'm pretty much doing now, lol?) Maybe so, I know I want something more out of life and I just can't put my finger on it, but all I can do is pray about it. Still having issues with my youngest daughter.....I only want the best for her but she has to do her part. I won't get into that though. So in closing, I just wanted to see if I still had my blogger page ( yayyyy, I do), and want to put down what was on my mind. Know this will not be the last. I plan on picking this back up. When I'm able to get me a laptop, it's going to be on and cracking. Well, I think I'll end this now. Hope everyone has a blessed night and stay safe. Smooches 😚 💋💋💋💋

Life on Life's Terms

It's April 25, 2014 and I'm just on my laptop doing different things like checking emails, fixing my resume' and other things, but so bored, so lost that I don't know what to do anymore. Anyway, the reason for my title is because I really don't get the meaning of it so, I'm going to interpret it to kind of make sense to me. Life on Life's Terms to me means going by the rules (which I get), but dang , can I catch a break????? I live in a Transitional Housing Program still and I am greatly appreciative to have a roof over my head for and my daughter, but the stuff that we have to deal with here is really starting to affect our mood. I go to work faithfully everyday and I try to make sure my daughter goes to school everyday like she is suppose to so that no one says anything to her. I mean, we are doing what we are suppose to do, I try not to complain, and I don't ask to go anywhere (meaning asking for a weekend pass, that's a whole other story), but people here just get away with so much that it's unreal. Yes, I should focus on me and my daughter because I am in recovery, ( from my choice of drug marijuana, and alcohol); trust me, my life is going well since being clean and sober for almost 3 years (May 9,2011 is my clean date), but as much stuff that I have to do, i.e., urine tests, NA Meetings, and Mental Health, to me feels like that is going to make me relapse, but I know that I'm way stronger than that, but I am getting so frustrated, overwhelmed and everything else. I feel like I am at my wits end, but I have to keep my focus for my daughter's sake because we are all we got, and I'm trying to make her understand. I know things will be thrown at me in all kinds of ways and I will constantly go through trials and tribulations, but why, when I'm doing right, good things don't happen for me??? Yes, I know, I have to be PATIENT. Ho long do I have to wait for things to work to my advantage???? I just don't get it. So, I guess Life On Life's Terms means, yes there are rules, life will come at me in all types of ways, I just have to keep sticking and staying I guess, continue doing what I'm suppose to do, focus on me and my daughter and not worry about other folks who aren't doing right or following rules, and just keep believing that in the end I will reap the benefits of me doing what I am suppose to do, and I know that in God's time, things will happen when it is suppose to. Maybe my blog doesn't make sense to any of you, but somehow, it does makes some sense to me. Well, I guess that's all for now. My life is a little bit unmanageable and I don't know, eventually, things will be alright.....EVENTUALLY. Till next time friends.....good night and God Bless.

Well, it is March 8, 2014 and some things have definitely changed for the better somewhat. I had finished my Food Service Training Program and graduated in June 2013, got a job in July 2013 as a Cook for Meals On Wheels but got laid off in November right before Thanksgiving. Was a little sad about it, but got another job (still with Meals On Wheels ), but working for a Church which I do love and appreciate. Been working there since the beginning of December  2013,but officially January 1, 2014 and they truly adore me as I do them. Still clean and sober; will be 3 years May 9, 2014 and I am so proud of my self. Trust me, there is so much temptation, but I know I came too far to mess up now. Still live in Transitional Housing, but I see it that God has me standing still because I know that I'm going to have a breakthrough and I trust and believe in HIM. I also am still trying to do my Cake Baking/Decorating thing starting this year. Been buying the necessary things that I need to help me get started. Just have to keep my FOCUS, because I really want to do this. Well, I guess this is all I have for now, so PRAY for me as I PRAY for you all. Thanks.....Till next time.